"Hello, John? Good to talk to you, Buddy. Say, John, Hillary and I really want to compliment you on a very well-run campaign. Especially since I sent my advisers over there to help you. It's too bad that you came up a bit short--sorta like Al, you know."

"Well, you know, Mr. President, it has been a very long night, but we are not really ready to concede. I have a bunch of lawyers up there in Cleveland now. There is some evidence that there was a good bit of abuse of some of our voters there and in other places. You know, of course, that we have a great deal of friends in Cleveland who know how to ste..., ha, ha, I mean, know how to manage affairs like this."

"Ha, Ha, John. You really are a card. Too bad you couldn't have allowed that sense of humor to come out on the campaign."

"Thank you, Mr. President. As you know, Teresa is a great fighter, and she ... "

"John. I am sorry to interrupt, but perhaps you should take the high road. I know that concept is hard for you to understand, but Hillary and I would be glad to talk to you about the dangers of the low road. We know a bit about that, ha, ha."

"What do you mean, Mr. President."

"This is not the end of the world, John. Well, it is the end of your world for sure, but there are other Democrats. Some of them might want to run for president in four years. Hillary has been mentioned. She wouldn't want the people of America to think that Democrats are mean, narrow, self-serving. You can't pull it off, John, for you don't have the talents that I have. You don't lie well at all, if you know what I mean. I mean that you forget what you said and appear to flip flop. You will never be a democratic president because you have to have that talent, ha. ha. It is ok to be mean, narrow, and self-serving, but you mustn't let people think that."

"But...."

"John, don't talk too much. That's another weakness you have. The reality is this. It is time for you to take one for the team, John. I know I didn't do that--I mean in that ugly Monica business--but this is different. This is you and that was me. You understand the difference, don't you, Pal? I know you do. If you don't, I have some other people that you don't know who will be glad to explain it to you."

"Ha, ha. Mr. President, you are a real card."

"Yes, John. I really am. Hillary sends her love. She has to send it somewhere, you know. Ha, ha."

"Thank you, Mr. President. I understand."

"I knew you would. Give our love to Teresa. Goodby, John."

"Goodby, Mr. President."